You've Been Crushed On!

My friend came up with this as one of her posts and suggested I do my own version of it. So why not? Of course I'll try to put my own spin on it but here it is.

Past crushes. Girls I've crushed on. Oh boy.

E.L. I still remember my first crush ever. Way back in second grade. I remember the exact time period in our lives when I started liking her. We've known each other since kindergarten. We became friends. And in second grade she got the chicken pox. And everyone kept a distance from her and I remember that it hurt her feelings, but not me, for some reason that moment when people kept away from her, I wanted to be near her. I developed a crush in that moment. Now we're just pretty good friends and I love that girl. She's hilarious. And I wish her the best!

I would spend a long time thinking said girl ^^ was the best one out there, and so I didn't actually have another crush till middle school.

W.DR. She was silly, and loud and funny and exciting and different from me in middle school. She was pretty. We had some classes together. Unfortunately at the time she was also very immature so when I wrote her a letter, it was kind of a disaster. But years later we became extremely close in HS. Now we're just good friends and I wish we'd talk more. She's still silly, loud and exciting.

C.K. My first unofficial/official girlfriend? In 7th grade. Again, I still remember the first moment I fell for her. 4th period of Life Science. She had been crushing on some jerk and we had slowly become friends. And that day she came in with tears in her eyes. We watched a film in class, and she started silently crying. We sat in a group so she sat right in front of me. I saw her cry and it pulled my heart strings. I sent her a note, and I fell hard for her she had braces, glasses, and she claims "frizzy hair", but honestly I thought she was the most beautiful girl I had ever seen. Years later she went on to lose the braces, and glasses and her hair is even more fabulous. She's still beautiful and a great friend. Funny enough in 7th grade when we started crushing on each other we had a close mutual friend and like some movie we ended up telling said close friend the same day that we liked one another. Said mutual friend took it upon herself to tell her that I liked her and tell me that she liked me. We "went out", which consisted of cute little love notes. I almost wish I could say I kept them but I'm glad I didn't. They deserve to be in the past. No I'm not bitter, but we just became so much closer as friends. Although I admit it took me forever to get over her. We broke up like after two weeks of "going out." But I kept crushing on her way into 8th grade.

Which brings me to E.W. Ironically she had been one of CK's best friends but I had never met her, and it wasn't until we had two classes together back to back that we met and became friends. We had 3rd period math and 4th period leadership. And she sat in front of me in math and we sat next to each other in leadership. She was goofy and fun and we got along amazingly. We had many adventures such as making our own middle school musical where we were afraid of getting jumped if we went into East Hall, known as the ghetto hall in our school. But near the end of 8th she developed a crush on some guy and started going out with him and I pushed my feelings away...

HS! 9th grade which brings me to E.P. who actually shares the same first name different spelling with E.W. She was extremely flirty and touchy, I had no chance. I had never dealt with crushes like her. Either they didn't like me or they did but we never were "touchy,". She was. And she was short. So when we hugged I felt like we belonged. She was my first major heartbreak in HS as well. But I don't care because it helped me grow. Every heartbreak has made me stronger and I appreciate it.

J.B. Oh the ice queen. She was one of my best friends in my first two years of HS. And she was sweet, but when it came to feelings and liking people it was like liking a wall. I don't regret my crush on her because she is totally crushable. She's smart and beautiful. And she has a boyfriend now which means she's not a wall anymore round of applause! She's still a good friend of mine.

C.B. I kind of had a crush on you, and then when friends found out you liked me they went and told me and I was pushed against the wall and pressured to ask you out. I don't blame them or you, it was my fault for letting me be pressured. Unfortunately because I asked you out so soon I ended up not liking you as much as I should have, and I hate that. But hey no hard feelings between us and I appreciate that.

A. I don't even remember her last name. And she was so weird because she didn't even want to be known by her real name but rather by a different name Zoey. I say Zoey because I know no one would be able to find her out so I have no guilt in stating that her "name" was Zoey. We aren't even facebook friends, but man was she pretty. She had been hanging out with one of my friends who I'd gone up to talk to and she kind of just interrupted our conversation and introduced herself. I loved it. We dated for like a week, before I found out how she really just liked someone for like a day and then moved on. Then she literally moved to another school. El Oh El. So it's all good.

Near the end of sophomore year E.W. and I got really close again and became the best of friends. So she's resurfaced. Why because that summer things happened and changed. We would talk all day long and all night long. She had a boyfriend that I'd helped in getting them together. And I ended up hating myself for pushing her to date him, only to realize a couple of weeks later that I liked her. A lot. What I didn't realize was that she ended up liking me as well. One night when things were bad for her and she called me crying. And later when on to tell me that the only person she had wanted to talk to was me. And she went on to say "would you believe me if I told you I think I'm in love with you," I still have those words glued to my brain and mind. I told her I loved her as well. But unfortunately things happened and she changed and I changed and it never worked out and we never went out, and now we rarely talk, because of her current boyfriend who doesn't want her to have any friends. No, I'm not bitter, but I do hate the idea that we can't be as close as we used to because of her boyfriend.

C.R. This was senior year. Honestly, I'd seen you before like junior year and I thought you were pretty and I found out you were dating one of my friends. Not a close friend but still a friend. So whatever you did not enter my thoughts again until senior year. You were single and in one of my classes. And then one day on facebook I had a message from you. You invited me to go to JA with you. A really special dance kind of like  prom but for the whole school district. I said yes. And I had planned on asking you out after the dance. But several little birds told me that you wanted me to ask you out asap. So I did. I still remember our first date. Going to Slaughterhouse, the haunted house set up in our local mall. You despite saying you wouldn't be scared were and I held you. Then we had pizza and talked. And going to JA was unforgettable. And sometimes I regret that we didn't work out but I'm happy that we can still be good friends.

K.L. You came into my life near the end of senior year. You walked into my math class at the beginning of second semester. You were new, you were tall blonde and beautiful. And I figured I had absolutely no chance. But I tried to befriend you. And we hit it off! We began hanging out every day at lunch and once went to get frozen yogurt together on a Saturday. We became close friends and I regretted having to graduate cause I knew we would start to lose our close friendship. I'm glad we're still friends, and thank you for helping me actually be excited about going to school again.

S.P. You were the gorgeous girl that sat next to me in math last semester. I think you're beautiful. And I know we wouldn't work out cause you missed so much school. And yet claimed you wanted to go the medical school route. Sweetie, I think you're beautiful, and I had a small crush on you. But get it together. College shouldn't be all about partying.

This is probably my most scandalous post to date because any of these girls could read it and probably know I'm talking about them. Thankfully no one reads my blog.

All these ladies helped changed my life and whether it was for better or for worse I came out alive, and I'm happy for the time being. And hopefully it has all brought me closer to finding the right one.

Future girlfriend/wife, please love me for me, and I promise to do the same.

Now there are some girls that I didn't talk about because they weren't crushes but they're still extremely special to me, and I will talk about them in the near future. But they get their own post dedicated to them. :) So look for them tomorrow.